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Those words were shrieked at me, Joel, and a tiny runt of a dachshund in a pink satin jacket last night.

No, we weren’t playing catch with the aerodynamic-looking little dog. We were riding our bikes down Southwest Boulevard, and chanced to pass a woman who was exiting a building and preparing to enter her car, with her (unleashed) tiny, impulsive dog who decided that it was going to chase us down.

So, as we passed this gal and her dog, I heard the distinctive skitter, skitter, skitter of dog claws on asphalt, but thought the dog was on one of those stupid extend-o leashes. Until the girl started shrieking. “NO! STOP! WAIT! YOU BIKERS, STOP, STOP, STOOOOOOOOP!!!!!!”

So, I stopped. And sure enough, the little dog pulled up right by my back tire and started making growling sallies at it.

The girl rushed up, snatched the dog up off the street, and started to make breathy, breathless exclamations, but I cut her short.

“Get a leash,” I growled at her.

“But, I was only going to the caaaaaar,” she whined at me.

“How’d that work out for ya?”

She harrumphed and flounced back to her car, her pink-jacketed dachshund safe in her arms, and I commented to Joel that for the cost of that idiotic satin jacket her dog was wearing, she could easily have had three rather stylish leashes. Which would do everyone a whole lot more good. Also, it takes like half a second to clip on a leash. I can’t imagine how long it takes to wrangle a wiener dog into a satin jacket, but I imagine it must take longer than it takes to leash said dog. For the amount of effort versus the practical results, I’d take a leash over dog-clothes any and every day.

If I knew my dog had no good sense (which she doesn’t) I’d put a leash on her when I thought she might possibly lose her tiny little mind and take off running. And if I were loading her into the car on a busy street with many distractions and possible temptations, I’d absolutely and certainly have a leash on her. I know my dog is impulsive and loves to run and chase. This girl seemed to know that about her own dog, but didn’t seem to make the connection between attaching the dog to herself and not having to chase her dog halfway up the next block when it took a whim and took off.

Well, I’m glad the little wiener dog didn’t get hit by a car or tangled up in my spokes or suffer any other horrible calamity, but I kind of wish a swift kick in the ass would come to her owner.

One Response to “NO, stop, PLEEEEEEEEEASE!”

  1. Juli says:

    C’mon Michelle – why didn’t you give the owner a swift kick in the ass?!? I would have been really tempted too. I’m with ya all the way!!!

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