Feed on

I’m about to post a video clip for y’all, but I’m warning you, don’t bother watching the video. Just listen to the audio and everything will be all right, good, fine, and amusing. The problem with this video is that it is a fan-made-vid/AMV/pathetic-piece-of-shit. It’s one of those things where somebody took an audio track, then “timed” images (or in the usual case, clips of anime shows) to the track. Many of them have roots in fan-fic, “shipping,” and people who speculate subtexts for the dumbest of TV shows.

I hate FMV/AMV/this-bullshit so hard. I consider it amongst the lowest forms of art. That said, and rant aside, this was the only audio track of this monologue that I could find that I could also share on this website, and so you’ll have to overlook the bullshitty stock photography slideshow and just enjoy the magic of Jim Gaffigan’s “Sleep” monologue:

The first time I heard this monologue, it seriously struck a chord. I remember being a kid, and thinking that going to sleep was a total bummer. I wasn’t even tired. It’s still light out. Corri & Kelli get to stay up until 9:00, I swear – ask their mom!

Then, sometime around college, I began to appreciate the gift of sleep. I scheduled my classes so as to leave myself an hour block in the afternoon for napping (2:00-3:00 for preference). I’d sleep until 9:30-10:00 a.m. on a Saturday or Sunday if given half a chance.

I’m not going to lie – I went to bed right around 10:00 every night this week, slept until 6:00, and honestly, could have happily slept on until 7:00-7:30, if it weren’t for those pesky cats and that whole having-to-be-at-work-by-8:00 thing.

Bed’s a great place. It’s warm, I can snuggle up with Joel, and damned if I don’t have some of the most peculiar dreams which I find pretty entertaining, at least. I’d be there right now, you know, if it were possible. Sleeping rules. It rules!

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