Meetzorp

Spanner in the works

Feb 8th, 2010 by Meetzorp

I cleaned a bunch of excess keys off my keychain and thought it looked a little sparse. I haven’t had much in the way of baubles or bobbles on there in ages, so I decided to fix that:

There is a house key, key to Joel’s workshop, key to my U-lock, and a key to the pickup.

And a tiny-tiny brass crescent wrench – in honor of the fact that I disassembled and re-assembled an entire Schwinn with nothing but a crescent wrench and a screwdriver.

I have a few other tiny brass tools that my Grandma gave me a zillion years ago, so I decided to highlight one of them on my keychain since it seems rather appropriate.

Posted in Distractions, Photo entries, Super-Short Entries, Utter Silliness | No Comments »

This movie basically sucked balls

Feb 6th, 2010 by Meetzorp

But the opening animation was AWESOME:

We’ve had about a 50/50 rate of hits and misses with Netflix. The movies that we’ve gotten and enjoyed were really great and the ones that sucked were almost unbelievably awful. The nice thing about Netflix is that it’s so inexpensive that if you get a dud, you can just return it and not feel like you are out much but the time. And the 45 or so minutes we bore with “What’s New, Pussycat” were way more time than we should have put into that contrived, uncomfortable, plodding streak of shit.

The following are my reactions, as posted to Facebook, the night we tried to watch that movie:

Next to “Talledega Nights,” I think “What’s New Pussycat” is the WORST movie I’ve only been able to stand to watch halfway through.

I honest to god though that was one of the most tedious, cringe-worthy, un-funny piece of crap I’ve ever wasted 40 minutes of my time on (I couldn’t stand it enough to see it through to the end). I thought that movie sucked with a vital power of suckitude not lightly given to mortal men. Can I spell it out any more plainly? That movie nearly made me barf from a combination of boredom, frustration, and disgust for the utter misogyny of it all.

The one thing I found really and truly funny in Pussycat was Peter O’Toole’s dancing. By the standards of anyone or any era, he is an appalling dancer. He looked like he was being electrocuted. And *that’s* supposed to be Mr. Suave & Debonair?

If the movie were as stylish and clever as the opening animation, it would have been a charming piece of work. This is one movie that aged really, really badly.

Posted in grumbles gripes and pointless bitching, Oh, for fuck's sake, videos | 3 Comments »

Crawling out of my burrow

Feb 2nd, 2010 by Meetzorp

Any woodchucks poking their heads out here in KC today weren’t too likely to see any shadows…it was overcast and kind of grimy today. Winter in Kansas City, when it isn’t snowy, is not an aesthetic triumph.

I’ve been hunkered down pretty deep lately…gone to ground so you might say.

Here I am popping my head up out of the hole. I permed my hair today because I was bored and it beats the hell out of cutting it all off and looking like this again:

The perm is a “temporary perm” (I know, total oxymoron, right?) which is supposed to last for about a month. I hope it does, ’cause I am totally loving the mad curlz.

Oh yes, our dining room…it’s gutted at the moment. A couple of doorways have been widened and there’s now a cool little window between the kitchen and dining room, as well. More about that another day.

I haven’t had much to say for myself lately. The winter “blahs,” as well as a few boring situational issues have basically sapped my will to write. I try to keep this blog positive – it probably presents an overly idealized vision of my life, but I am not that comfortable with “putting it all out there” like a lot of bloggers do. I don’t want to come across as a whiney drama-queen, nor a total trainwreck, nor do I want to look like I am grubbing for sympathy, freebies, or page-hits.

But I haven’t been a super-happy-monkey lately, because my phone-jockey job is sapping my will to live. Also it is winter, which always takes the starch out of me. Also, my old house, which has been on the market since last July, was foreclosed on a couple of weeks ago, and the events leading up to that debacle were a bit stressful to say the least, and totally ate my brain. When the foreclosure finally happened, it knocked me out far more than I thought it would…it was so anticlimactic, yet somehow it also felt like the rug was pulled out from under my feet.

I don’t want to rehash the whole sordid tale of how I became a statistic in the Great American Real Estate & Financial Crisis, so I’m going to attach my hardship letter I submitted when I groveled before Wells Fargo in the attempt to accomplish a deed-in-lieu-of-foreclosure solution (which obviously was denied).

Basically, when I was very young, dumb, and full-of-myself, I bought a house in ghetto territory at an inflated price and thought I was doing something clever. Then I divorced, re-married, moved, lost a job, was unable to find sufficiently remunerative work to keep up my end of the mortgage agreement, and ultimately got foreclosed upon. Even after I found a full-time job, I found myself unable to make up the arrears and continue to maintain the place. It would have completely depleted my bank account and then some to come current on the payments, and when I was filling out the paperwork for the deed-in-lieu agreement, the math bore out that it would take in excess of $200 a month more than I earn to keep current with the payments.

So, now all of that bullshit is behind me. Another grim chapter in my stupid life closed, and I hope not to revisit it much ever again!

And so I plan to return to my regular type of entries about more fun and interesting things…like the upcoming annual F-Lawrence Pub Crawl, which is always a good laugh.

Posted in grumbles gripes and pointless bitching, Hair issues, meta, Work/career (vague as to avoid doocing) | 1 Comment »

This guy just makes me smile a lot:

Jan 21st, 2010 by Meetzorp

I’m gonna be schmoopy for just a minute. I enjoy the heck out of Joel’s and my relationship – he just tickles me eight shades of pink and I wanted to share a couple of fairly awesome pictures of my feller:

Joel is imitating a sea-gull in Santa Cruz – this is the day before we took off on our big coast-to-coast adventure.

Getting the goofies in the tent somewhere in mid-Nevada. To be fair, here’s me, the same night. I think the Nevada desert broke our brains.

One of my favorite pictures of Joel of all time, by Chris “Professor ChrisGo” Thomas.

Imitation of a Gumby while stacking lumber.

One last picture for “awwww” factor – Joel chillling with the housepests on Ruby’s first night with us. Awwww!

Posted in Family, Photo entries | 6 Comments »

9-25-2005, a charmed day

Jan 16th, 2010 by Meetzorp

The day I took my favorite photo to date was a charmed day – some days are. Thereâ€™s no predicting which ordinary day will turn out to be extraordinary, but that was one of those days when the insects, zinnias, and I were somehow operating in perfect harmony.

Iâ€™d gone out around midday on a Sunday to potter around in the flowerbeds out in front of my old house. I was pulling weeds and just generally surveying the lay of the land out there and things were looking extraordinarily good.

The next door neighborsâ€™ kittens squeezed through the chain link fence between their house and mine and were being ostentatiously cute.

There were some delicate little yellow butterflies disporting themselves amongst my gaudy zinnias.

I spied a nice Monarch butterfly, too.

A grasshopper was out enjoying an unusually colorful luncheon.

But the crowning glory of this particularly glorious afternoon was this casual, big bumblebee who was hovering around and drawing snacks from my garden.

Iâ€™ve long been a fan of bumblebees, and as bumblebees go, this one was a top-notch representative of her field. She bustled around amongst the flowers like she knew exactly what she was up to. She was a big olâ€™ bee on a mission.

Her furry form was dusted with vivid orange pollen.

She seemed to have an uncanny ability to pose for the camera, too.

Iâ€™d have to say that this bee totally made my day that day.

Looking back over these pictures (and a few others in my archives) made me realize that I need to have my camera out and about more. I kind of fell out of the habit after I got my G9 – it seemed to fancy and costly to just tote around everywhere, but on the other hand, it is too nice of a camera not to use. Also, now it is a couple of years old, has been repaired twice…nothing is perfect forever. I should use it sensibly, and if it gets broken again, I will have it fixed again. If it gets broken too badly, I will have to save up to replace it. But one way or another, I will not get any more great pictures unless I go out and take them, and that is certain!

Posted in Garden, nostalgia, Photo entries | No Comments »

Shut up and ride!

Jan 16th, 2010 by Meetzorp

I tell you thereâ€™s nothing like a group of cyclists to whip up a tempest in a teapot.

The most recent fuss and bother that finally penetrated my protective carapace of â€œnot-giving-a-fuckâ€ is a Facebook kerfuffle centered around a group of disgruntled motorists who just canâ€™t stand sharing the road with cyclists and have therefore established a discussion group wherein they can grouse, gripe, and foment against bicycle riders. They post comments about wishing they could run bikes of the road and to regale each other with stories about what heckling they do allow themselves to indulge in.

Predictably, the legions of cyclists have got their collective chamois in a twist (what a disgusting thought!) A counter-group sprung up to encourage Facebook admin to delete the â€œanti-cyclist hate group,â€ but that movement went nowhere. The original group was not judged to be a hate group, their screed did not qualify as â€œhate speech,â€ and even though they are offensive to many, they are protected by that pesky Freedom of Speech thing.

Moreover, the stuff these guys are writing isnâ€™t a bit different from the bile that spews in pretty much every article in the newspapers, on cycling news sites, even on personal blogs when a story is reported about an injury, harassment incident, or altercation. The â€œcagersâ€ contend that cyclists need to get off the street, that it is for cars and the cyclists contend that they belong there. And they can argue about it endlessly in so many comments sections as long as there is an Internet to fight on.

But if cyclists want to start shit, and some of them very obviously do, then why should the opposing side be denied that same privilege? Itâ€™s just like the whole Rush Limbaugh/Pat Robertson/Ann Coulter contingent. Theyâ€™re allowed to be as vile as they want, and everyone who doesnâ€™t like it is allowed to state as loudly, vigorously, and often that they donâ€™t approve. In fact, many of the opponents of the Limbaughian Pundits are every bit as vitriolic in their opposition. If they want to shut up the talking heads, then by rights they would have to shut up, as well.

If the cycling advocates want to force the anti-cycling advocates to shut up, then logically, they could be forced to shut up, too.

Seeking to silence someone you donâ€™t agree with is whiny and cowardly. Who gives a good goddamn if a handful of loudmouths who canâ€™t share want to make a stink on the Internet (where everyone can be the badass)? Their rhetoric doesnâ€™t really affect anyone. They preach to a small choir and no matter how much bluster most of them will front online, very few of them will ever take any action offline. And the few who would take it offline would probably have been causing trouble with or without the internet. The bottom line is that there are mercifully few sociopaths in the world who will actually go around hurting others without fear of consequences. And fear of consequences (incarceration, possible execution) is sufficient to keep most people in line. The few who arenâ€™t kept in line were probably beyond much hope anyway.

All that rising to the bait accomplishes is stoking the culture of fear. Too many people think of cycling as a dangerous activity and cyclist advocates who are constantly re-circulating stories of tragedy, violence, and aggression are only adding to that. I know Iâ€™m not the only person who thinks that riding your bike is the best possible cyclist advocacy there is. To hell with re-posting news clips, going to meetings and bellyaching to officious officials, and squalling on internet forums.

That kind of â€œadvocacyâ€ fosters a sort of victim mentality; a two-wheeled martyr complex. It basically amounts to slactivism. Posting opinions in letters-to-the-editor, fussing at public meetings, and burying your representativesâ€™ mailboxes in â€œcall-to-actionâ€ letters may make you feel like youâ€™re doing something, but youâ€™re really not. All any of that amounts to is shouting down a barrel.

If you really want to make a difference, encourage others. Donâ€™t scare them off broadcasting all these horror stories, donâ€™t rehash every close-call and harassment youâ€™ve ever experienced. Invite a non-cyclist friend along on a fun ride. Organize a beginner-friendly event. Forward positive, fun stories about cycling. Show its best side. Sure, cycling has its inconveniences and hazards, but it isnâ€™t and shouldnâ€™t be all doom and gloom.

Go ride your bike. It may be the most subversive statement you could ever make.

Fashion statement? (photo courtesy of Joel, who thinks my dreadful fashion sense is amusing)

Posted in bike commuting, biking, dumb things I have done, grumbles gripes and pointless bitching, Oh, for fuck's sake | 2 Comments »

Orange is the color of progress

Jan 13th, 2010 by Meetzorp

Apparently.

One of my recent projects, as such, was completing a few things that I had cut out ages ago but hadn’t put together. Since cutting is the biggest ass-pain in sewing, it should be logical that the construction stage should be a breeze and plenty of fun…so why do I have such a bad habit of putting it off? This article, via Jacquie Phelan’s blog, maybe explains a bit of it. I think we’re also culturally encouraged to delay gratification. It’s like a sign of maturity or self control or some other line of crap that I don’t always ascribe to.

Anyway, on to the good stuff since I’m on a “enjoy that gratification” kick over here.

If you could average these two shots, you would have a pretty good idea of how this dress looks. It’s not as shiny as the one on the left would have you believe, but it is way more intense and bright than the one on the left. This kind of iridescent fabric is hella hard to photograph with a flash.

The pattern is New Look 6674, which is produced by the Simplicity pattern company.Â New Look is their more trendy line.Â Â I modified it from the original…I kept the more flared skirt from View A, but I shortened it to just below knee-length, as tea-length looks kind of stupid on me.Â I also changed the sleeves.Â Cap sleeves are not a good choice for someone whose shoulders are a little on the wide side…it can make my arms look unnecessarily chubby, and if I can easily avoid that, I sure as hell will.Â I added about 2.5″ to the cap sleeve, as I didn’t want the puffed sleeve…again with the wide shoulder thing.Â It makes a girl very picky about her sleeves.Â Either I want them hells of puffy, like my Minnie Pearl dress, or else I want them to be fitted more smoothly.

Here’s the back view.

With the modifications I made, I have to say that I am uniformly pleased with this pattern. The bodice fit was perfect out of the envelope, and the neckline isn’t too low, which is my usual concern about wraparound tops. I am incredibly shy about showing off too much boobage. Another nice feature is that the skirt fronts wrap ALL the way across, so you don’t run the risk of having your skirt blow open or fly back if you don’t have a particularly ladylike gait (can you guess this has been a problem for me in the past?)

While I have every intention of wearing this dress on any occasion I can make up (and maybe even sometimes for no occasion at all) I think I will use this pattern again in less formal fabric. I’m thinking a Hawaiian print rayon would be AWESOME, with solid color for the neckline band, waistband, and belt tie.

My other “I-cut-this-out-ages-ago” project was this exceedingly silly skirt which I made from some very odd sized scraps from an upholstery project I did for a friend:

The pattern is Simplicity 5304, but as usual, I didn’t make it exactly as originally designed.Â The original pattern is for a miniskirt, and I don’t really do minis anymore, so I added about 6″ to it (about 4.5″ after hemming) to make it hit right directly at the knee. I also should have been more punctilious about measuring because although I cut my correct size out, it turned out to be about 2″ to big in the waist, so I am wearing it as a hip-hugger skirt until I get motivated to put in some darts in the waistband.

The fabric, which is fabulous beyond all sense, is from Amy Butler, who has a pretty massive cult following among younger home-seamstresses.

I used a different view of this pattern ages ago, when I made a black a-line skirt that is trimmed with self-fabric applique flowers, a “vine” made out of super-long chenille yarn, and a frill of netting around the hemline:

I wear this skirt so frequently I know that when it finally becomes to shabby to wear in public anymore, I will immediately craft a replacement.Â I still have loads of the chenille yarn, and this is a pattern I will hold on to like crazy.Â It’s snap-easy…the six-panel skirt went together in maybe an hour, and that counts finishing seams.Â The applique one took longer because of the appliques and ruffle,Â but sans applique, this is a skirt that could go together in probably 45 minutes.

Anyway, I’m planning on rocking out in the new skirt at work tomorrow.Â I figure I’ll pair it with this top I made last winter:

(I’ve since changed it…I took off that stupid little tassel, and about 3″ above where that was, I appliqued another burnt-orange leafy to balance out that enormous fleur-de-lis thingy up on the shoulder.Â This top is about four shades darker than the orange on the skirt, but it works well with it nonetheless.Â A pair of brown herringbone tights and a vintage aqua-white-and-orange polka-dotted scarf to hold up my hairdo and all should be pretty darn spanky.

Posted in Fashion/Sewing stuff | 7 Comments »

Remodeling my wardrobe:

Jan 12th, 2010 by Meetzorp

Back in 1997, I wore my skirts in two lengths. Either Ginger Spice or Jinger Duggar.

Then :

Ginger.

Jinger

At that point in my life I labored under myriad arbitrary, rigid, random, and utterly nonsensical self-imposed fashion rules. Skirts could either be short or long; no mid-length. No animal prints ever. Pink was NG (the above dress was my sole concession to pink and only because the print contained a great deal of burgundy). No dress pants. Nothing “frilly.” No florals.

In the years since my college days, I have broken pretty much every rule I used to follow. Nowadays, almost all of my skirts hit near the knee. I wear dress pants. I think leopard print is a top-notch accent pattern. Especially with stripes, plaid, or florals. I wear pink. Regularly. I have quite possibly the frilliest blouse in the Western world:

Anyway, I have been going through my wardrobe lately and getting rid of some stuff that just doesn’t work for me and re-working some things that have untapped potential. The dress and skirt above were in the “to-refurbish” pile.

I just couldn’t let the dress go; I love the fabric too much. I got it in a hell of a sale at Hancock Fabrics in Rapid City, SD. It’s 100% silk and it’s a really great paisley pattern. I reckoned that I could detach the bodice (it was a 1970s style babydoll dress) and drop the skirt down to the natural waist and put it over an underskirt, since there always were cling and show-through problems with this dress. I had some pink crepe in my stash that I thought would be a pretty close match to the lighter pink in the paisley print and when I dug it out, I discovered that it was a close to perfect as you can get.

It didn’t go on my dummy quite right because the dummy has a skirt frame built into it that is just about 2″ wider than this skirt is at the hipline and so it couldn’t be pulled down to the natural waistline like it’s supposed to be. On me, however, it is just fine. And I am really happy with how the underskirt turned out. I was going for a circa 1914 overskirt/underskirt look. With the underskirt, the silk hangs better than it ever did in the past and the whole thing is just so much more wearable. Even back in my Ginger Spice days, I felt a little overexposed in the silk sundress. It was so skimpy and so diaphanous and it really didn’t feel much better than running around naked. I think I maybe only wore it a half dozen times in all the years I have owned it. It will get much more use now!

With the plaid skirt it was a lack of practicality that brought about its re-styling. Basically, it’s not realistic to try to ride a bicycle in an ankle-length skirt. Right around knee length is better. I ended up cutting about a foot off the top of the skirt and gathering it back into the waistband. The fabric is a really nice quality wool and it’s still colors I wear a lot, so I didn’t see any reason not to re-work it into a style more conducive to my lifestyle. I thought of cutting it off from the bottom so I wouldn’t have to fool with the waistband, but I like a fuller skirt and I thought that it would be better to cut it off from the top and lightly gather it. I wear flared or full skirts mostly these days and so this works better with my usual silhouette.

My personal style has shifted quite a lot since I was 20 (and with good reason, too!) but it’s nice to keep a few older pieces in the running.

Posted in Fashion/Sewing stuff, Sewing | 1 Comment »

Sinking Spectacle

Jan 11th, 2010 by Meetzorp

Iâ€™ve been keeping a blog sporadically since 2002, which is a plenty long time, though sometimes it seems like Iâ€™ve kept one for much longer. Back in the day, I used to post on this message board called Hissyfit quite a lot, and sometimes Iâ€™ll think, â€œI know I blogged about that some while back,â€ and try to find it in my archives, and lo, itâ€™s something from 1997-2000, from the Hissyfit heydays. One of those phantom blog entries would have dated back to 1998, and would have been my extremely mixed review of the blockbuster hit movie Titanic.

I remember my impressions of Titanic from â€™98 because they remain static: itâ€™s not much of a movie, but damned if it ainâ€™t pretty! The storyline is predictable, the dialogue is unrealistic, a lot of the acting is simply lousy, but the sets, costumes, and props are marvelous. I didnâ€™t go to that movie to get all mooshy over a sentimental romance story, nor did I go to gaze upon Leonardo DiCaprioâ€™s callow pumpkin head. I went to enjoy seeing Kate Winslet in complicated yet diaphanous dresses. I went to vicariously explore the poshest ocean liner of all time.

Titanic was the kind of movie that if you went in with nothing but superficial expectations, you would come out satisfied. If you went in wanting a bombastic cheesy romance, then you got it in spades. If you went in to ogle great set design and costuming, then your desires were gratified. But if you had really big expectations for a Great Cinematic Experience, then you probably left disgruntled and unfulfilled. I freely admit I went in to that movie because Iâ€™d heard about how meticulously Cameron had tried to re-create the look and feel of the RMS Titanic. I remember having read the National Geographic article after they found the wreckage of the Titanic and seeing archive photos of it in its original grandeur. I was excited about the movie because I figured it would bring those old black-and-white photos to life. Then, there was also the attraction of the costumes.

I think 1912 is one of the most exciting years in fashion; it represents a true demarcation between the fluffy, pouter-pigeon silhouette of the first decade of the 1900s and the â€œmodernâ€ silhouettes of the 1910s, with their shorter skirts and more asymmetrical design. Starting around 1909, more avant garde ladies started experimenting with their waistlines, dabbling with a high-waisted â€œEmpireâ€ silhouette with cropped jackets and raised waistlines. Circa 1911, the masses began to warm to the draped-tunic-over-pegtop-skirt as conceived by Poiret & Lucille. Intricate Art-Noveau-inspired beadwork, appliquÃ©, and embroidery embellished elaborate ensembles; dainty filigree and enamelwork accessories added their charming details. The overall look was bold, exotic, costly, and colorful. The costume designer for Titanic truly did her homework; the dresses were true to contemporary fashion plates and photographs. Even the outfits for the herds of extras did not come off as anachronistic, inappropriate, or anything less than lavishly and carefully planned out.

Because the movie met and exceeded my few expectations of it, I can honestly say that I like Titanic. You donâ€™t go to an Andrew Lloyd Webber play because the music is going to be good. You go for the elaborate production values. Much the same can be said of watching Titanic. You donâ€™t watch it to see a great movie; you watch it for its spectacular set and costume design.

At least that’s what I did!

Posted in Costumes and disguises, Distractions, Recommendations | No Comments »

Loaf

Jan 9th, 2010 by Meetzorp

For reasons that make no earthly sense to me or anyone else (Iâ€™d wager) Iâ€™m rather unnecessarily fond of the word â€œloaf.â€ I find it funny.

Meat-loaf. Nut-loaf. Loaf of bread. No loafing. Kitty-loaf. Hlaf-weard.

Meatloaf is mostly funny because of the burly pop-rock musician who goes by that stage name. â€˜Tis the season for Rocky Horror Picture Showings and theme parties, and large men donning leather jackets and greasing their hair into pompadours, wielding chainless chainsaws and going as Eddie. I went to a particularly good Rocky Horror Picture Show theme party in college dressed as Columbia. My bustier was a little too short for my body, though, and I spent a lot of time hitching it up in order to preserve what tiny bit of modesty left to me. That was back when I had butt-length hair, and I had braided it the night before, and then let it down, teased it out, and sprayed it within an inch of my life. A couple of pounds of makeup, some fishnets, and a borrowed bustier, and I was able to vamp it up fairly convincingly.

Nut loafâ€¦nut-loaf is one of those things that gives vegans a bad name. Itâ€™s like a meatloaf, but without meatâ€¦instead, the protein source is ground nuts of some sort or another. Iâ€™m sure it is possible to make a tasty nut-loaf, but so far I have only been subjected and exposed to dreadful ones and it seems like a shameful way to destroy a perfectly good snack.

Loaf of bread â€“ not at all funny. But again, I sure do like the word â€œloafâ€ and I like to bake. Especially a nice rosemary-raisin loaf. Mmmmmmbread.

No Loafing

Kittyloaf (now, with More Cowbell)